How to reduce stress in family life

less stress

A young woman with black hair in front of a yellow background.

Less stress in family life

Life with children is colorful, loud, and full of surprises. There is laughter, arguing, cuddling, and playing. Sometimes there are tears and dawdling, and every now and then, doors slam. Children often challenge us, especially during developmental phases or when they simply have a strong temperament. For us as parents, this means constantly adapting to our child and their growth. However, most of the stress doesn't come from the child but from the many tasks in our daily lives, such as work, household chores, cooking, cleaning, shopping, appointments, and visits. A relaxing afternoon can quickly turn into impatience and frustration. The dentist appointment is approaching, but just before leaving, the kids are still playing and dawdling. Their teeth haven't been brushed, and their favorite toy has suddenly disappeared. The clock is ticking, and patience is running out. »We're going to be late for the dentist because you were dawdling.« Sentences like this slip out when our nerves are frayed, and we react with reproach. But if we repeatedly blame children for dawdling, it can trigger inner anxiety. Over time, it becomes harder for them to stay focused on their play and to engage patiently and attentively with their own ideas. However, it is not the child who creates the time pressure. Punctuality is the parents' responsibility, not the child's. Therefore, prepare your child for upcoming appointments in advance. Clear announcements like »We’ll brush our teeth in fifteen minutes«, supported by an egg timer, hourglass, or by pointing to the clock, can help. Make sure to consistently follow through with your announcements. Avoid vague phrases like »You can play a little longer, but then we have to brush our teeth«, as they don't give the child clear guidance. Once the announced time is up, it will be easier for the child to finish their activity. Get your child actively involved in the preparation process. Let them pack their favorite toy to take along in a small backpack. This helps children feel involved and makes the process easier for everyone.

A preschool child packing their favorite toy into a yellow backpack.

Loving and trusting parenting requires above all time, calmness, and patience. Only then can parents sensitively support their children, listen attentively, and address developments and conflicts calmly, without constantly feeling under pressure. Many parents only realize how quickly the first ten years have passed when their children reach puberty and they can no longer make up for that time. With puberty, the relationship changes noticeably, and connecting with their children often becomes more difficult than in the early years.

An Indian preschool child hugs his mother.

When you ask children about their biggest wish, they usually say: More time with their parents.

A young man in a white shirt against a yellow background.

Easier through everyday family life

It's easy to say that a relaxed everyday life with children is possible. But in reality, things often look different, especially when stress persists and leaves us feeling overwhelmed. Stress is a part of life, but when it takes up too much space, it burdens both us and our children. A calmer family life with more ease, time, and peace begins with a crucial question: How do I want to organize my life? Answering this question honestly isn't always easy. Change takes time, and not everything can be implemented from one day to the next. Nevertheless, it's possible to face the challenges of everyday life and identify the causes of our own stress. By consciously questioning our priorities, we can gradually adjust our daily routine and create many relaxing moments with our children.

Asian mother and daughter walking in nature.

Relieving the daily grind

Life with children brings us joy, but it also comes with many challenges, especially on stressful days. Work, housework, shopping, illness, swimming lessons, a birthday party, or a move leave little room for a relaxed week. Many families reach their limits because their days are planned from morning to night. In this packed daily routine, even an unplanned appointment is enough to throw everything off balance. If this pressure continues, it strains both body and mind. Parents’ own expectations often add to the pressure and create more stress. The image of parents effortlessly juggling careers, household responsibilities, childcare, and social lives has little to do with reality. The glossy images we are shown rarely reflect real life. Professional success, loving parenting, and a well-organized home are usually only achievable with support from a housekeeper, nanny, or grandparents. It is up to us to reflect: Do we approach the first ten years with our children more calmly, or do we try to juggle everything at once, only to let something fall by the wayside in the end? By acknowledging our own limits and treating ourselves with kindness, we can significantly ease our burdens. Sometimes it’s enough to leave things undone, let go of the idea of a perfect household, cancel a visit, or adjust plans on short notice. Daily life also becomes easier when partners support each other and share responsibilities. It’s about setting priorities and focusing on the important things in life. Less is more, because it means having more time for yourself and your family. Small changes that we actively implement can help reduce stress. After all, stress rarely comes from the child, but rather from the structures and expectations we impose on ourselves. Those who are content with less ease the family routine and share more joy together.

Father and daughter hugging in the park.

Constant stress is harmful
Stress is like an invisible backpack full of stones that gets heavier the longer we carry it. Constant stress causes increasing difficulty in calming down, creating a negative cycle.

‍I can't switch off
When we are under constant stress, our body stays tense, so we can't even relax in the evening. The stress lingers and prevents us from fully unwinding. Only by actively addressing it can we regain a sense of calm.

‍Where are the car keys?
Stress reduces our ability to remember. We forget appointments, misplace items, or lose track of what we wanted to do. Taking notes and regular breaks helps reduce the strain on our memory.

‍Stress inhibits parental abilities
When we are constantly stressed, it becomes difficult to raise children. Essential skills like compassion, patience, organization, focus, and understanding are often limited in such situations.

Family stress puts a strain on children
Under stress, we are often impatient and irritable. This unsettles children, leaving them feeling helpless, sad, and alone.

Stress makes us louder
When we are stressed, we often react loudly and scold quickly. This can hurt children and make them feel intimidated, even though they are not the cause of our stress.

Don't be like that!
Under stress, we are quicker to see the negative in our children's behavior, and small conflicts seem bigger than they actually are. Children are full of energy and present us with challenges, as this is part of their natural development.

Children are exhausting!
Under stress, we are quicker to see the negative in our children's behavior, and small conflicts seem bigger than they actually are. Children are full of energy and present us with challenges, as this is part of their natural development.

Questioning high expectations
Sometimes we expect children to live up to our expectations. But such expectations put both us and our children under pressure. Children need space to grow, without comparisons to others and without the pressure of excessive demands.

Perfection is not necessary
The demand to always do your best at work, at home, or as a parent only puts you under pressure. Be kind to yourself because even doing less is perfectly fine.

Take time for yourself
‍Taking 15 minutes a day to relax is enough to recharge your energy. This is not selfish but gives you the strength you need for your daily life.

Relaxing in nature
A walk in the forest or park is relaxing for everyone. Being active in the fresh air helps to let go of stress and gives parents and children new energy.

Relaxing together
Listen to a favorite song, look at a book together, or have a quick cuddle. Such small breaks reduce stress and bring a smile to your child's face.

‍Practicing gratitude
Listing one or two positive moments with your child in the evening shifts your focus away from stress and challenges. This helps you end the day on a positive note and recharge for the next day.

A shares goal
Parents who support each other manage daily stress more easily, leaving more time and space for positive moments with their family.

Don't be like that!
Constant stress reduces our compassion. We often expect more from our children than they are capable of and fail to see that they need our support. A kind tone and encouraging words boost their self-confidence and help them face challenges more effectively.

Don’t overlook the smile
Under stress, we often overlook the beautiful moments in everyday life, like our children's smiles or their small gestures of affection.

Father and two little toddler boys having a picnic in a yellow hay field in summer.

Simple moments reduce stress and bring ease and joy to everyday life.

The office clock is showing three o'clock.

Why all the rush?

Sometimes we overlook the most beautiful moments in everyday life with our child because we believe we have to get everything done immediately. Instead, we could let go of the stress and take time together for a conversation or a small activity like a dice game, free from time pressure and without distractions from our phone.

More time instead of rush

Around midday, I pick up my son Luka from kindergarten on my way home from work. Then we walk home together, and sometimes we stop to do a quick grocery run at the nearby supermarket. Most of the time, I’m in a hurry to get home quickly with Luka so I can take care of the household chores or deal with other tasks before we head to the playground in the afternoon. When I push Luka the whole way to walk faster and not dawdle, we both end up arriving home in a bad mood. He’s disappointed that we don’t take the detour through the park, where he can watch birds or maybe even spot a squirrel. I feel frustrated because it seems like we’re losing too much time. In those moments, I fail to notice how much he enjoys taking the way home at his own pace. He collects small stones and leaves, jumps over every puddle, or balances on the low wall by the park. I’m becoming more and more aware of how much my own time pressure stresses me out and how I overlook the beautiful moments with my child. So why all the stress, when so many things can wait until later or my husband can take care of certain tasks, like grocery shopping? Today, I see the way home as valuable family time. We stroll home together, talk, and I feel delighted when Luka discovers something exciting, feeds the ducks, or finds joy in the smallest things. By now, I’ve learned to relax during this time and simply unwind. Of course, there are days when we’re in a hurry. On those days, I tell him beforehand: »I’m sorry, my darling, but today we’re in a hurry because I have something urgent to take care of.« To my surprise, he has no problem keeping up on those days. At home, I give Luka a hug and thank him for walking home so quickly. Afterwards, he keeps himself busy, drawing in his room or building with his blocks. In the afternoon, we go to the playground, just like we do every day.

A little boy feeding ducks in a city park.

Children have their own pace

Children live in the moment and are not determined by the clock, as is often the case with adults. With bright eyes and full of curiosity, they discover the world around them. They explore their surroundings, try new things, and absorb impressions like a sponge. Our everyday life, however, follows a completely different rhythm. Parents are usually in a hurry, and children have to keep up with this pace. Even the way home from kindergarten or their grandparents can quickly become a challenge: »We have to hurry because I don't have time!« This pressure burdens children. They respond by being defiant or whining, and in the end, everyone feels stressed. Yet it’s completely normal for children to need more time. They get dressed in slow motion in the morning, daydream while eating, or stroll home from kindergarten at a snail’s pace. What we perceive as endless dawdling and despair over is completely normal for children up to school age. Especially young children don’t understand what ten minutes mean because they can’t relate to it yet. Only with increasing age and through their own experiences does a child's sense of time develop. This is why it is important for parents to practice patience and offer their child more understanding. Of course, this is not always possible, especially when there are appointments to keep. But if you plan a little more time for everything, you can create a calm everyday life and interaction free of stress, for example by getting the day off to a relaxed start. Children remind us to slow down in daily life and make more time for one another.

A young woman with long, brown hair against a white background.

Reduce stress with small steps

Noise, countless tasks, or the pressure to maintain a perfect household often lead to stress. Find your rhythm and consciously make time for moments of calm. Here, parents share how they deal with stress and how small habits help them relax for a few minutes.

Asian woman with closed eyes against a pink background in a moment of calm.

Tense neck and shoulders
»When my neck feels tense, I know I’ve been under stress for too long. I used to ignore these signs, but today I take them seriously. With small stretching exercises, such as shoulder and neck rolls, I relax the muscles or massage the affected areas with my hands. Just a few minutes are enough to help me relax.«

‍Overwhelmed by other people's problems
»I often feel completely stressed because colleagues, friends, and family constantly unload their problems on me. Over time, I have learned to set clear boundaries: I cancel appointments or consciously avoid getting involved in such conversations. This way, I protect my energy, which I urgently need for myself and my own family, and I feel much better as a result.«

Sometimes it’s all too much
»When I come home stressed and late from work, and my children are very loud, I feel so overwhelmed that nothing works anymore. I can’t sort my thoughts or take care of the household tasks. In such moments, I lie down on the sofa, close my eyes, and try to relax for 15 minutes and clear my mind. However, this is only possible if my husband takes the children to the playground or the park.«

Negative thoughts
»I notice that stress takes over when everything just gets on my nerves: work, household tasks, the kids, and even a movie doesn’t help me relax anymore. That’s when I pull the emergency brake and go for a walk by myself for at least half an hour every day. If my husband is at home, he spends time with the kids. If he works late, our kind neighbor watches them for a while. As a thank you, she always gets some cake when I bake or a small pot of solyanka when I cook. Sometimes, I invite her for a cup of coffee or give her a gift card.«

Stress level reached
»When I notice that I’m mindlessly snacking around the clock, it’s a clear sign that I’ve reached my limit with work, kids, and household responsibilities. Instead of raiding the pantry further, I take a few moments several times a day to quietly drink a glass of water or eat an apple. I look out the window, organize my thoughts, and think about what I can postpone or let go of. Then, I set aside any perfectionism and tackle things at my own pace.«

Stress from too much information
‍»I can’t take in any more information when the constant flood of messages overwhelms me. I then react irritably to the smallest things or quickly raise my voice, which affects my family the most. At that point, I turn off my phone, the radio, the TV, and all social media to find peace again. I only check emails once a day during this time. A week without these distractions feels like a reset for my mind, helping me regain energy.«

‍Overwhelmed by everyday life
‍»When I come home from work and the laundry is piling up, clutter is everywhere, dinner still needs to be made, and my kids take up so much of my time, I feel tense. Then I sit down with a cup of coffee and write a list of tasks I want to complete over the next few days. I hang the list in a visible spot on the fridge. The daily visit to the playground is always my top priority. Afterward, my two children are calmer, and I can get things done in peace. I cross off each completed task and feel noticeably more relaxed.«

‍Restless before falling asleep
»When I can’t fall asleep at night because of everyday problems and my thoughts are spinning like a carousel, I write everything down in my journal. So I set my worries aside for the time being and clear my head. This helps me relax and fall asleep more easily.«

A little girl hugs her mother against a pink background.

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The content and implementation of this website were created with a great deal of time, money, and personal experiences, reflecting our own learning processes. We hope that these experiences will inspire and support you in better mastering the challenges and joys of parenthood, and in providing your children with a happy childhood. If any errors have crept in, we would appreciate your feedback so that we can correct them. We would like to thank everyone who appreciates our work and welcome any suggestions. If you would like to share your thoughts or provide feedback, feel free to email us. We value your input and look forward to hearing from you.

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